If you’ve opened this article expecting to read some bewildered nonsense by someone who doesn’t understand what’s so great about Supermacs, prepare to be disappointed.
Not only am I aggressively pro-Supermac's, I am also aggressively pro-making-everyone-else-love-Supermac's.
If you’ve ever eaten in the iconic fast-food joint you’re more than likely on my side in this—Supermac's is absolutely class.
But saying it’s class is far from saying it’s classy—in fact, it’s the restaurant’s distinct lack of notions that allows Irish people to be so open with their love for it.
The following is more of a love-letter to Supermac's rather than a non-biased review. If a non-biased review is what you’re looking for, try TripAdvisor or something. (Even though everyone on TripAdvisor agrees.)
So what makes Supermacs the best chippie in the world?
1. The burger sauce, obviously.
I should mention that I’m writing this while hungry so there may be some slight exaggerations.
Though there are literally countless fast-food chains around the world, all claiming to have their own ‘special sauce’ or ‘secret ingredient’, Supermac’s burger sauce sets it apart from the other try-hards. It is the absolute King of flavours. It has been several months since my last Supermac’s meal and the thought of that sauce is bringing a tear to my eye. My heart and stomach weeps for that burger sauce. (Again, only slight exaggeration.)
The only fast-food outlets that even come close to the glory of the almighty Supermac's is the myriad of knock-off restaurants that copy everything from the menu to the colour scheme. (Superbites, Superman’s, Superma’s…you get the picture).
2. The massive menu
You want chips? Grand. What type of chips? Curry chips, curry cheese chips, garlic chips, garlic cheese chips, taco chips, chips with stuffing and coleslaw?
Now you’ve decided on your side, what’s the main? Fish, sausages, fried chicken, grilled chicken, beef? Burgers or wraps? A snackbox or pizza? Oh, it’s only 8am in the morning and the thoughts of all of those is making you sick?? No worries. Have a gawk at the breakfast menu. Buttered toast or a Brekkie Mac?
3. The pure generous helpings
Have you ever ordered a curry chip and been disappointed with the miserable amount of watery sauce that’s been measured out like Scrooge counting his coins? (In this scenario, curry is the currency of Victorian England.)
We’ve all been there. The betrayal is simply unspeakable. But a curry cheese chips from Smacs means your chips are genuinely swimming in curry and piled high with slowly melting cheese. The garlic chips ensure you won’t be bothered by vampires for possibly the rest of your life. And the taco chip has the incredible power of sobering up any mouldy person just from the sheer volume of food being shovelled into your drunken body.
4. Supermac's…. At Night
Most Supermac’s hire a bouncer to keep guard in the evenings, which might sound weird but is absolutely necessary.
This is because once the sun goes down, the chippie turns into the country’s craziest and most unexclusive club. The restaurant can stay open later than most nightclubs due to not selling alcohol, which leads to massive afterparties being thrown within its walls every weekend.
The most notorious of all is Galway’s Eyre Square Supermac's, where the parties got so insane one year that that the university’s ‘Raise and Give’ charity week was shut down forever.
And when we say insane we mean… insane. Does this look like a fast-food restaurant to you?
The ban didn’t stop the Galway students, who have celebrated an Unofficial 'Rag week' in Supermac's annually ever since.
5. Actually, Supermac's at any time of the day
On special days, the loyal customers of Supermac’s don’t need an infusion of darkness and alcohol to go absolutely mental in the restaurant.
Sometimes the excitement just gets the better of you, and you’re just so absolutely buzzing to be in a Supermac’s you simply cannot restrain yourself, and it turns into giant pro-Supermac’s rally.
(Just kidding. This was the day of Limerick’s big win in the All-Ireland hurling final last August. But we’re sure a pro-Supermac’s rally has broken out in one of the restaurants at some point).
6. The beef between Smac's and McDonald’s
Did you see what I did there? With the ‘beef’? No? Never mind…
Supermac’s feud with international chain McDonald’s has been fairly well publicised over the past few years, with the Galway chain trying to break out of Ireland and into the American and UK markets.
Enter McDonald’s, the conglomerate bully afraid of the smaller chain’s hypnotic power over its fanbase.
— Supermac's (@SupermacsIRE) August 8, 2019
Supermac’s has managed to turn the numerous legal fights with McDonald’s into a clever marketing campaign, drumming up support from customers all over the world, and has now won two court cases against Ronald McDonald.
Which brings us to the last point…
7. It’s opening in London
THAT’S RIGHT. IT’S HAPPENING.
As many Irish immigrants will tell you, the worst thing about living abroad (after missing your family and people asking if you’re from “Northern or Southern Ireland”) is the fact that nothing comes close to Supermac’s here.
Many a hungover day has been spent complaining about the distinct lack of curry cheese or taco chips, but those dark days will soon be behind us as Supermac’s have announced they intend to open a shop in London within the next twelve months.
You better believe we’re buzzing.
If you’re still not convinced that Ireland’s obsession with Supermac’s is not only understandable but Right and Just, I recommend you get on the next ferry and check it out for yourself. Try hitting Galway for a certain week in February to get a real feel for it.